Stimulus bill opportunity

There is a great opportunity to create a lot of jobs, using money from Porculus Americana.

Here's the deal:

California auto repair shops now are required to check tire pressure

Maintenance shops will have to check the tire pressure of every vehicle they service under a new regulation adopted Thursday by the state Air Resources Board.

The rule takes effect July 1, 2010, and is part of the package of rules the Air Board is adopting to reduce greenhouse gas emissions. It includes smog check stations, engine repair shops and oil service stations. Car wash, body and paint, and glass repair businesses are not included.

“Under-inflated tires waste fuel, cause tires to wear out prematurely and increase drivers’ safety risk,” said Dan Zielinski, senior vice president with the Rubber Manufacturers Association, which represents tire manufacturers, in a news release. “This regulation will help protect California’s environment, help consumers save money in fuel and tire costs, and help Californians optimize vehicle safety.”

Yes. You understand it correctly. The California state government now requires that vehicle tires be checked for proper inflation, even if the vehicle is in for repairs having nothing to do with the tires. Though the measure has obvious Big Brother connotations, it is (being California), like, dude, like, toadily in harmony with the government doing all things for all people, whether they want it or not.

So I think it's a magnificent idea, rife with job-creating opportunity, and we should do it here in Colorado, too. While most shops already check tire pressure (most of them do here in The Smile Hi City; I asked), making a regulation, or even a state law, that requires it just makes sure it is done. It's like the pooper scooper ordinance for the city. As we have seen, the mere passage of that ordinance has completely eliminated (no pun intended) canine elimination by-products.

But think of the revenue-generating opportunity: Our police officers could carry gauges and check tire pressure on each vehicle stop. They could ticket offenders, and help fill the city's coffers with money from fines. This could lead to the creation of more jobs in the courts, as more clerks would be required to keep up with the tickets and court cases.

And the gauges would have to be certified, as with radar devices. So we would have to create state-certified laboratories for tire gauges. And we would have to have state inspectors to certify the state-certified laboratories. Lots of jobs there, and they could apply for grants for free Federal money to fund them.

The police officers would have to be certified on the proper use of the gauges. This would create an entire new field of police-related equipment training. The officers could attend a one week basic certification course, where they would learn to check tires on all passenger and commercial vehicles. There could be an extra week for a 'special vehicles module', to take in such machines as aircraft, implements of animal husbandry, even wheeled military vehicles convoying on the public highways and byways.

The gauges of private citizens would have to be certified, too, of course, otherwise how could motorists risk running afoul of John Law? They'd have to take their vehicles to a shop every month or so for a certified tire pressure gauge operator to run the test, and provide proof of testing. Perhaps in the form of colored windshield stickers. We'd create jobs for more sticker printers and sticker affixers.

Perhaps the state could charge a fee per gauge, the inspection certificate on the gauge renewable annually. Professional gauges would have to bear a higher fee, of course. In fact, if we can get this rammed through the state legislature - no one would actually have to read the bill - a colleague and I already have plans to get the state contract to open up the shops to certify the calibration on all those tire gauges. Probably be able to get about $10 each from John Q. Public, with a percentage to the state. I think we could certify state gauges, for the state patrol and police, for example, we can go for a state contract to certify law enforcement units at, oh, $63.76 per gauge.

Think about this. The job creation opportunities are nearly endless.

Perhaps we should bring this up before city council, and get the ball rolling.