6/1/17

God's Own Man



GOP Congressman: God Will ‘Take Care Of’ Climate Change If It Exists



"Well, as a Christian, I believe that there is a creator in God who is much bigger than us. And I’m confident that, if there’s a real problem, he can take care of it.”
So ... we humans do nothing. It's in God's hands. If climate change, global warming, is really a problem, God's got it for us, and we don't have to do anything.
So ... the war in Syria, the bombing in Kabul, the opiate epidemic in Colorado and throughout the nation, poverty throughout the world, human trafficking, the crazy fat little NORK, and the most consummate evil of all, the Democrats ... these must not be problems, since I'm not seeing much Godly handling going on.
But wait! I have missed the obvious! God *is* working!
He has given us ... Trump.
Trump of the gilded bathroom fixtures. Trump of the debauched casinos. Trump the Pussy Snatcher. Trump, stiffer of little workers and contractors. Trump the slumlord (well, Kushner ... Trump's Wormwood). Trump of the Kremlin. Trump, Mammon's Main Minion.
Godly Trump. Trump, God's Own Man. Trump, the Christian. Trump, our Savior and Salvation. Trump, darling of America's evangelicals (well, 81% of the white evangelicals, who have suffered such grievous persecution at the hands of the godless liberals).
Trump ... the consummate American.
Yep. I see God's hand in it all.
Not.
I think I'll stick with our favorite heretic and those of his ilk.
Is a gilded bidet anything like a gilded calf?